Choices

This morning I had to have blood work done and was forced to fast.  It is so hard for me to ever feel deprived and that’s exactly how I felt.  Obviously, I wasn’t really deprived.  I was just forced to wait an extra couple of hours for my first cup of coffee and for food.  However, I did realize (again) that when I am not allowed something it is a trigger.  I am able to refrain from less than healthy food but I cannot be told I am not allowed to have it.  If I put that kind of restriction then I will obsess and then binge.  Perhaps that has to do with my being extremely stubborn too.  It applies to a lot of areas of my life.  Tell me I can’t and I will, just to prove you wrong.   

I prefer to make choices and sometimes I choose that piece of cake or those nachos.  This does not work for everyone.  Some have to be strict.  We are all different and we have to learn what works best for us.  Also, at different points in our journeys it may be necessary to refrain from certain items.  When I really need to refrain I have to mentally prepare..  I turn it to where it’s my idea because _______.  I fill in the blank with what ever the real reason is.  For instance right now I am TRYING to consume less carbs.  I can’t say I am going low carb only that I am trying to have less.  I also can’t use the word diet (as I’ve written about previously).  The reason I am doing it is to trim down a little so I can achieve some personal goals. 

Basically, as I stated earlier, we are all different.  We all have different goals, opinions and what works best for us.  Ideally, we need to recognize those things and work to be our best selves.  Every moment we have that choice to make. We can move forward, laterally or backwards.  My hope is that if we ever move backward it is just to evaluate and consider taking a different path.